Trail Shung And Fwei Too

Trail Shung, And Fwei Too.

By Pat

As you know if you are attuned to Shung Fwei, this is the Year of the Flaming Weasel. What does this mean for prosperous and harmonious backpacking? If anything?

Well, I am here to tell you, being a Certified Practitioner of the Ancient Art of Shung Fwei, holder of a Third-Degree Purple Belt (with tassels), and what I say is "Kung Hei Fat Boy! May you have blister free walking now!"

Armed with my frequently-updated analysis of what the Heavenly Energies have in store for us, and having been recently moved out of a very successful marketing career with assistant duties in purse sales, I think I can say I know what you need as a backpacker. In fact, it is so obvious that anyone should be able to tell, just by a glance in your general direction, or a quick throw of the sticks.

For example, focusing on individual animal signs, with one eye on what the Flaming Weasel is up to these days, it is clear that the next 12 months will be good for those born under the signs of the Chipmunk, Manatee, Sidehill Gouger, Hoedad, Chub-Chub, or Moo-Cow. I mean, obvious, right? Everyone knows that.

On the other hand, if you are a Rabbit, Sheep, Monkey, Ox, Doofus, Dik-Dik, or Dildo, then you may well see some challenging times coming your way. But again, how surprising should that be?

Your Shung Fwei Chart fully illustrates each detail of this and should have alerted you by now. If you don't have a personalized Shung Fwei Chart yet, just drop by, OK? We will soon get you beyond any seductive negativity, into a curing regime of self-enhancement, by preparing a Chart. I also offer family discounts, so stop by soon.

Of the five elements (Water, Wood, Fire, Earth, and Metal), we need to decide which is most relevant in the area of backpacks and backpacking. Note that there is no Nylon Ripstop Element, no Spectra or Dyneema, no Cordura, not even a hint of Ballistic Cloth or even a Canvas Element to be found anywhere in the above list.

Do not be dismayed.

At first you may feel distressed, but this is why you need a Certified Practitioner of the Ancient Art of Shung Fwei, for whom everything impossibly confusing is actually trivial. The Elements have come to us from ancient times, when there was not even the dream of Silnylon, let alone Cuben Fiber, but the fundamental principles still do apply. These principles tell us that what your backpack is made of (or even its size, weight, and style) is truly much less important than its color.

For example, Brown is friendly, rich, and grounded, like dirt, or poop (which belongs on the ground), right?

Blue may be the color of water and peace, but it is also the color of adventure and exploration.

Green of course represents life, growing energy, and a mellow, organic high.

And let's not forget Gray. Gray is the color of security, reliability, and durability. Durability is important in a backpack, don't you think? I do, sometimes.

You may surmise that if you weld together a backpack from thick Metal plates, then it will be durable, but not if it is Pink. Pink is the color of love, baby girls, feminine allure, and slumber parties, not backpacks. Pink will defeat all backpacking attempts unless you are a genuinely girly girl. Is this you?

Likewise, White.

White represents marriage, peace, union, and translucent draperies.

So White is then a timely but sad reminder if you are in sore need of new draperies, or have just seen your marriage crash and burn. Your seemingly invincible White welded Metal pack would then feel depressingly heavy and would not serve your needs well at all. It would only bum you out.

Or say your pack was Silver. Well, trustworthiness is not bad, and that is a quality of the Silver color, but do you need romance, glamor, a high tech feel, or a dreamlike experience on the trail? Probably not, especially if you are watching out for snakes.

We Certified Practitioners of the Ancient Art of Shung Fwei are aware of these subtleties and can be of great service for an actually nominal fee, if averaged out over your hiking lifetime, may it be long, as it will be if you keep your monthly payments up to date.

Recently in a relaxing, pre-event dinner attended by many other energetic Practitioners, Yours Truly enjoyed the company of similarly Highly Accomplished Individuals who also straddle the worlds of Shung Fwei and backpacking, just as Myself does. This should be a hint. After dinner was the event, an exposition on the Primary Element for the Year of the Flaming Weasel.

That Element is Metal.

Back to Metal we go! Could you guess?

How surprising is that? Not!

Of all the five elements, Metal is by far the most important this year because the Flaming Weasel is both a natural force and a dangerous one, as you know if one has ever run through camp and into your tent.

The Flaming Weasel's most serious characteristics (the flames, of course, but also its teeth and claws) are inflicted on the Earth element, so necessary to support your backpacking, but they are also significant hazards to the Wood element, not to mention your tent, no matter how precisely it is aligned with the Force. And then there is the skin of your face and arms to think about.

A good way to ensure protection against such afflictions this year is first, as noted, to choose a pack of the proper color. The proper color serves to deflect weasels of all kinds, not just the flaming ones, and does not even require batteries to work. This should be a strong hint right there.

Beyond color, ensure the proper balance of Elements. For your pack, and luckily for you, only one is needed: Metal.

But it does not have to be Heavy Metal, or even Middle Metal, though for maximum self-defense purposes a bar of solid iron is always handy to carry, such as a two foot length of re-bar. But for a pack, no, do this instead: Guarantee that your pack contains sufficient quantities of Metal in a Propitious Surrounding Configuration, and this does not need to be heavy at all.

Vain hikers often try using jewelry or decorative chains strung here and there, but jewelry is ineffective on most trails, not being specifically designed for backpacking, and looks cheap as well, and may clash with your outfit.

It is much better to lightly coat your new pack with an all-organic adhesive and then sprinkle liberally with pure powered aluminum. Or to save money, use boob glitter.

Both of these deflect sunlight, in effect symbolically protecting you from both the Heat of the Sun, and the Hairy Eye of the Flaming Weasel. Because of my divinations deep into the Shung Fwei Esotery (nothing of which I am allowed to share here, so sorry), I have determined that actual Metal is not in fact even necessary as long as the appearance of Metal is maintained.

Thus the suggestion about boob glitter, which is not, as is often thought, even Metal, though it appears so, which is good enough. And it is much less costly. Besides, who even knows what they're putting into aluminum these days anyway?

As in so many aspects of life, appearances are all that really matter, which gets us right back to color, so you may be beginning to get a feel for circular reasoning, the very foundation of Shung Fwei, and why we Certified Practitioners of the Ancient Art of Shung Fwei need to charge what we do.

So, this is all to the good but Metal is only one third of the story. The other two parts are, as in most endeavors, entirely Luck.

Luck comes in two flavors, Heavenly Luck and Mankind Luck.

Heavenly Luck is often the only thing you have to save the place where your tail resides, when you otherwise have no hope at all, so try to stay on the good side of Heaven if you value your tail, and the place it grows from.

Unlike Heavenly Luck though, Mankind Luck comes to individuals who work hard at enhancing their true Fwei-Nature, by constant practice, by doing good deeds, by hard work, by learning and using proper food hanging techniques, and by paying consulting fees on time to their Certified Practitioners of the Ancient Art of Shung Fwei.

Slight cheating is also acceptable in certain circumstances, but never with regard to the invoice.

Beyond all that, get a decent pack from an established company, keep it clean and in good repair, and as always, try before you buy. Keep your receipt.

Other services I provide include in-home or online consultations, corporate seminars, laying on of hands, Shung Fwei slumber parties, gift certificates, marital, investment, and fashion advice, real estate sales, and upbeat, tear-free no-cry funerals.

To receive a free Shung Fwei Tips Brochure, just think good thoughts. Need a website designed? I do that too. Also house-sitting and dog walking, day or night. Just whistle. (Two long and one short. I'll come running.)

 

One of the stories from Bag on your back.

 

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Me? Trying to get this geomancy thing working.

Oya, Photography These Days

Fingers. Fingers are all you need. No finicky expensive machinery.

Look. Make those fingers frame what you want, blink once if it makes you feel better, and remember what you see outlined by your fingers.

No shutter to jam, no memory card to overflow, no battery to fade out. No extra weight or bulk. And you're waterproof and dustproof by way of evolution, the real intelligent design.

Want to print a shot? Difficult of course, but that's something done these days only by old guys who drive Buicks. Not backpackers. So let it slide. You'll be fine.

Uploading to Twittle, Facebork, FensterGram? Can be problematic too, but you've got permanent memory right there in your head, and a mouth, and a the ability to use it, so recall what you saw and share your stories. One word is worth a thousand pictures anyway.

As a last resort of course, all your images can be recovered during the autopsy. Don't worry — nothing is ever really lost.

 

Eric Mencher "Some People I've Seen"
"Eric Mencher: From Photojournalist to Master iPhone Street Photographer"

 

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Me? Have a set of alpaca bath roses for sale. See me at the Black Anger Bar Steakhouse & Fight Club any night.

FTK

"'Fastest Known Time', sounds impressive. Didn't know that time could actually go fast", said Eddy Tredsucker, famous trail personality, who has gone ever so far in his day, in practically no time at all. "But I did it," he adds. Check.

In case you care. Some don't. Most don't. And the rest don't know what it is. Usually it's called "FTK", and signifies a speed record.

But as the great Yossarian said, "the idea of pennants as prizes was absurd. No money went with them, no class privileges. Like Olympic medals and tennis trophies, all they signified was that the owner had done something of no benefit to anyone more capably than everyone else." -- Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"

In this case it's faster.

For some, that is important. For others, it's delusion. Especially for backpackers. But then again, a lot of them eat it up because backpacking, the least glamorous sport, is still, when you get right down to it, a bunch of walking. Yesterday. Today again. And then more tomorrow. Often not even a little fun. And after a while the monotony gets to be a whole lot more than just a loud annoying hum. Gigantically more, and if you know about this "FTK" stuff, at least you can pretend that it has some importance, some significance. That you are a part of something, even if it is entirely and completely pointless.

But no one knows what backpacking is, mostly. No, not really. Only backpackers. Some backpackers.

If you start talking about backpacking, then if anything, anyone within earshot who might possibly maybe have heard of "backpacking" once upon a midnight dreary will think that you are a 22-year-old derelict, college student (or both), who is mindlessly traveling the world, sleeping in bug-infested hotels stinking of stale urine, lustily gobbling any and all drugs, collecting infections, covered in scabs, and endlessly scratching. And maybe that is you.

Only backpackers though, only backpackers know that backpacking is really about sleeping in the dirt, trudging mud, shivering though rain and cold, feeding your blood to swarming mosquitoes and flies, eating vile food (if any), stinking, doing more stinking, and endless scratching. See the difference? Maybe.

Some, in addition, knowing full well what backpacking is, having done some, even a lot, and knowing full well what the challenges are even if they themselves have not whacked the wasp's nest that record setting is, think of "FTK" as "Frothy Knackered Twits". And who is to say that they are wrong? Who? Eh?

Take Hester "Anguish" Anderlass, who established an FTK on the Amazing National Scenic Trail (AZT) in 2016. Desert sunshine. Spiders. Some rain. Well-marked trail. Stunning views. Easy walking. Dust. Difficult trail. Ups and downs. Eyes in the grass. Strange noises. Odd encounters. Cow shit water. A Norwegian. Deer, skunks. Grasslands. Cool. Hot. No. Yes. Realizing that one day she would die. Days up to 50 miles long.

Then blinking a few times and wondering what had just happened.

Typical. Pretty typical backpacking, except for the 50-mile-days, and the excessively blurred memories due to the speed effects and all.

Miles — you want to do them, have to do them, can never stop or even slow down, in pursuit of doing nothing at all better than everyone else, except quicker, and you've just about got it.

She also gave a FREDx talk about it. I didn't go. Fred neither. We were thinking about Rees, Howard, and Jim and how they finished the Pacific Crest Trail in 35 years. New record. Try beating that one.

"Breaking the PCT Speed Record", by Rees Hughes
From "The Pacific Crest Trailside Reader"

 

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Me? Still pointless.

There Are No Stupid Questions

Only a lot of inquisitive idiots.

Q: I want to hike the Pacific Crest Trail from Mexico to Canada — can I take a taxi on the days I don't feel like walking?

A: Sure, but backcountry taxis are all coin-operated, so bring lots of quarters — maybe a 15-pound bag to start with. You don't want to be stranded in Las Vegas without a ride, or money to play the slot machines.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes?

A: If you go in a clockwise direction. (This is important.) Unless you are very experienced, then going the other way could make you dizzy, which might attract unwelcome attention from rangers, and you stand a good chance of getting cited for being "under the influence". Also, keep your pants on. Even if you aren't showing any signs of dizziness, but are running around in the bushes without pants, this may trigger a "red flag alert", during which television crews are called in, so make sure your hair is combed.

Q: So it's true what they say about backpackers?

A: Some of it, but it's hard to say which parts those might be.

Q: Are there any ATMs along the trails?

A: The ATM, or "asynchronous terror moment" may occur at any time or location, regardless of what you might be doing, hence the "asynchronous" part. Say, for example, that you are awakened in the middle of the night by a loud snap, followed by a crash, and then a deafening, wordless wail. Immediately you begin thinking that you should have spent a few moments calculating the smallest limb diameter on a douglas fir tree that could support a 350-pound (159 kg) black bear, because obviously one has just climbed up to your food bag and snapped off the limb you hung the bag from, bringing the food, the limb, and the bear back to earth, including enough injuries to instigate a blind fury incident. This is all normal, and you have been through it many times. What you don't expect next is having something heavy crash into your tent, fall on top of you (trapping you inside your mummy-shaped sleeping bag) and hearing it begin to swear with a pronounced Scottish accent, especially since you are backpacking (and camped) alone. As a side note, the ATM is also an international scientific measure of fear equivalent to about 146.959488 pounds per square inch (1,013,249.958604 pascals) of lung pressure produced during the average panicked scream. And, needless to say, when you finally do emerge from your tent to find out just exactly what is going on, everything is normal, and quiet, your food bag is still where you hung it, there is no one else in or near your camp site, but your tent is, of course, trashed.

Q: Which direction is North?

A: Whenever you go hiking or backpacking, there are certain essential things you should always carry. One of these is a map. Maps are handy because they show landmarks, topography, fast-food joints, and car washes. But that isn't all. By convention the top side of a map is defined as north, so, if you are ever confused about the finer points of compass directions, simply turn your map right side up, and peek over its top edge. You will be looking due north, and if you walk in that direction, then after some time you will return to exactly the same point that you started from, so you can't get lost either. These features have been a standard part of all maps since at least the days of ancient Greece, when Homer of Simpson laid down his 17 Cartographic Principles in 384 BCE, following a collision of two ox-drawn vehicles whose drivers became confused over the right-of-way at an intersection of six rural pathways in the southern Peloponnese. If the Greeks could figure it out, then you can too.

Q: Can I bring my monkey? I'm getting a marmoset monkey soon and was wondering if I can bring it backpacking. Any thoughts?

A: Like most things, context is important. If you plan to be hiking the Appalachian Trail, and you have a small pack that the monkey can carry, probably no one will notice. You find all kinds of people on this trail. Typically, men let their hair and beards grow, while women shave their heads. Some even hike naked, so a furry monkey carrying a pack is likely to be mistaken for a family member, possibly your son or father. If, however, your monkey is quick to anger, and delights in flinging feces at strangers during one of its hissy fits, then it may be best to bone up on your mediation skills before hitting the trail for the summer. And don't forget to carry a supply of moist antiseptic wipes — they can be really handy for rapidly defusing cleanup situations. And one more thing..."monkey butt". Monkey butt is a highly contagious disease afflicting, as you might guess, monkeys. And those who love them. If you find yourself troubled by soreness, itching, and redness that occurs "back there", or in some cases "down there" as well (especially if you are really tight with your monkey), and if the discomfort causes you to walk bowlegged like said monkey, then you may indeed have monkey butt. But if you are a backpacker you probably have these symptoms even if you hardly ever get within feces-hurling range of even one monkey. It's par for the course, as they say, along with having your own personal cloud of flies. So you might as well bring that monkey, because it can't really make things much worse.

Q: My mama did not raise her boy to sleep in no damn dirt with bugs and creepies crawling all over him. What's wrong with you people anyway, to want to go and do something like that?

A: Swift as wind. Quiet as the forest. Steady as a mountain. Conquering like fire. Able to inhale banquets. Impervious to bugs. Laughing at monkey butt. We are hikers.

Q: Do you eat stuff?

A: No. The Backpacker Code prevents the ingestion of any food for the duration of a hike. This is why most packs are so big. You might think that backpacker's packs are loaded with food, and that's why they are ginormous, but since backpackers are not allowed to eat (not only by sworn oath, but by law in most places), they need something to do while on the trail, so they bring lots of toys. Toy trucks, life-size dolls, board games, playing cards, musical instruments, firearms, medical implements, textbooks, knitting tools, you name it — anything that might relieve the boredom and take a person's mind off food gets tossed into a pack. Food porn too. Lots of that. If you pay attention at any trailside campground, you'll notice that many backpackers (especially thru-hikers who may be on the trail for months at a time) tend to retire early. You'll see them discreetly slip into their tents one at a time until the place seems deserted, but eventually you may hear the gentle rustling of a food magazine's pages being turned one after another, plus some heavy breathing. No matter how curious you might become about exactly what is going on in there, it is considered extremely rude (and may be dangerous) to disturb one of these people in the midst of their private activities. Best to observe only from a distance, or to go elsewhere and leave well enough alone.

Q: What happens if you see an animal?

A: Like all of nature, animals were placed here for our use and enjoyment. Anyone familiar with backcountry ways is also familiar with animals, and knows how to put them to good use. Take moose, for example. Moose are common everywhere, even in the very centers of cities, though most people are not aware of this. The reason is that, despite what you may have heard about the moose's aggressive nature, the creature is actually extremely secretive and shy, and able to blend into its surroundings by changing the color of its pelt at a moment's notice, and a moose, even a large one, can simply vanish from view without even moving. There is an excellent chance that you have walked right past moose all your life without even noticing them. But if you do notice a moose, be sure not to make any comments about its appearance. They are muscular but sensitive and insecure animals, and their feelings are easily bruised. The most common reaction of a moose teased about the size or shape of its nose or ears, for example, is to charge and gore its tormentor, or trample him to death, only to regret the action after it is too late to do anything about it. This is where all the nonsense about aggressiveness comes from. It's really only self-defense. A much better course of action if you do see a moose is to coo softly and talk about how inspiring it is to finally encounter a real moose and recognize it for what it is — the largest and most magnificent species of deer on earth. This is sure to get you on the moose's Christmas list, or better yet, may get you a ride on its back, as happened to Theodore Roosevelt, a man who was, you may recall, once President. It doesn't get any better than that, except for snake juggling, but you have to join a church to do that.

 

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Me? Me too.

Great Hikes I Have Never Done (And Don't Care About)

I once read M.J. (Nimblewill Nomad) Eberhart's "Ten Million Steps". This is a good book. Not great literature, and not excessively well written, but I didn't expect a diary to be, and this is essentially a trail diary. He has spirit though, and I learned a lot. It would have been good to hike with him.

Even if the book isn't great literature you can't fault the man. He did what almost no one else could do. Go ahead. Raise an objection here. Lift your hand and wave it. Stand up and shout. Tell me about others who have hiked farther in a lifetime, or in a season, who have gone faster or lighter. Tell me something, and then watch me ignore you. All of that is good. That's all good, but irrelevant.

In 2007 Andrew Skurka hiked the The Great Western Loop, "a 6,875-mile footpath that links together five existing long-distance trails — including the Pacific Crest Trail, Pacific Northwest Trail, Continental Divide Trail, Grand Enchantment Trail, and Arizona Trail — and a trail-less segment through the Sonoran and Mojave Deserts."

OK. I will never do that. That doesn't mean that I hate anyone. I am incapable of it.

I admire the determination and mental toughness needed, not to mention the insane level of physical conditioning required. That said, I still say that Eberhart did what almost no one else can do. There are some like Skurka who have done "better" (farther, faster, flashier, with better public relations — categorize it any way you want) but they haven't really, I think. The pool of those who can hike from Florida to Quebec in one year at age 59 is so vanishingly small that I have to consider all of them as superior beings, members of a clan comprised of superhuman entities I can barely comprehend.

I'd like to see those who are now in their early 20s to mid 30s pass by about 30 years from now, heading out on 10-month trips that no one else has done. Given the way that people are leaping at new things every minute, virgin backpacking trips will be scarce as 60-year-old transcontinental trekkers by then.

Maybe what's most important is not major league sports or the extreme niches within a sport but what people do of, by, and for themselves, on their own. In other words, if you're looking for something to do, it might be that the way to go about it is to do what feels good. To you. I think so.

Sleeping in feels good, but only on some days, and only for a while. I'm not saying you should aim for that. You need a challenge, something useful for defining yourself and making you feel good about life while you're doing it and after you've done it. In the middle of it though, maybe not quite so much, not that often. Not everything that is good or worthwhile is always fun while it's happening. As an aside here, you've probably learned by now that it's many of life's little disasters and minor calamities that make the best and funniest stories, but only later, often much later, following an appropriate amount of reflection. And healing.

OK, challenging and interesting. After that, what then? Be specific. Trust your innards. They will let you know.

If you decide something with your head, it's probably wrong. If you think about something that you heard about, that's probably wrong too. Take Andrew Skurka. He finished The Great Western Loop. If you hadn't heard of it earlier, you have now. It's an impressive accomplishment. Does that mean that you should go and do it too? Probably not.

Notice that Skurka eventually began referring to himself as a "professional backpacker". In other words, though he may have liked his work, he ended up doing a job. The bigger and flashier he was able to make something, the more likely he could get sponsorship and be able to earn a living. OK for him. I'm not saying that it's bad, but as another example consider whether you want to be a government employee because the attorney general of your state just broke up a price-fixing ring. How much sense does that really make? Same with choosing the right backpacking trip for yourself.

If you hear about something, and if you've always kinda-sorta had it in the back of your mind, and this is the last shove over the edge and you can't help yourself anymore, then I'd say you have a winner. Go for it. Not necessarily elsewise.

Kick back. Give things a rest for a while. Ruminate. Let something come to you.

Assuming that you have experience at backpacking, and are comfortable with backpacking, and know about what you can handle, and have a feeling for places you have been, then you have a good base. Let those experiences talk to you. An idea or two will come along. Reading is good, and talking to people you know is good. If someone like Skurka is speaking nearby, go have a listen. Keep an ear open for the small sounds, the little mouse-like ultrasonic squeaks that everyone else misses. Look for the door that's open only a crack, letting a bit of intriguing light in. Investigate those things.

Look for the oddball, out of the way place, the trail you hear about that everyone seems to pass by, saying they'd maybe like to get back there some day, but don't. Feel your way into it. You're looking for yourself in the world, for a place that needs you and where you will feel at home. It may not be the famous trail where everyone else goes. The best experiences after all are the ones that tell you the most about who you are and what life is all about, and the less overhead the better.

I've always wondered about people who hike one of the really big trails. The Appalachian Trail, Continental Divide Trail, Pacific Crest Trail. What are they after? I understand the idea of international borders. An international border is a useful concept, but I still don't quite understand the idea of starting at the Mexican border, touching it, and then hiking for months to go and touch the Canadian border. For those hiking the two westernmost of these three trails, that is the story, but why, exactly?

The Appalachian Trail seems to make more sense. It is still arbitrary but is also much more focused on actual geography: Springer Mountain to Mount Katahdin, no political boundaries really involved. It is all about place. Going from Atlantic to Pacific makes sense too, or traveling the same route in the other direction. Loop trails make sense to me, as do trips to experience particular seasons. Political boundaries and timetables do not.

True, if you want to do something you have to plan, and schedule, but scheduling down to the minute destroys a trip. Racing is wrong. Racing is a thing that I'm not talking about here. Racing is complex and done for other reasons. Backpacking is done for itself, in its own time, in its own way. There are hours and days and weeks and resupply points and there is always a limited amount of time, and you have to obey the limits but marching along the dotted line with a stopwatch in hand is going too far.

FTK kills the experience. Dead.

Keep it simple and you will be right. You get up in the morning, and after that you do the right things in the right order to get home again, but other than that you don't need to play along. Don't give yourself over to the rules of the game for the sake of the rules, or of the game. Steer an easy course while remaining in control. Maintain an even strain.

I used to know someone who scheduled things a year or two in advance, and hiked with a guidebook and map constantly in hand. She was precise about always hiking the "official" trail. She had been a lot of places over several decades and yet her life didn't seem to have a soul. Not to me. Maybe I'm too small to understand, but her experience on the trail seemed to be a lot more about bagging things in the proper time in the proper order by the proper, official rules than about finding joy.

And as I see it, that's what this is really about, the joy, and to find joy you have to keep things simple, and open, at least a bit.

I'm not in the big leagues, and not headed there. Maybe I truly am an idiot, but here's an idiot's advice if you want it: look for the small stuff. Go where others don't. Be quiet. Make yourself tiny. Move slowly. Stay humble. Keep your eyes open. Listen. Wait.

Some of my best times ever have been the unexpected ones, in places other people just don't go. Sometimes this is only a few feet off a trail. Cut away from the trail, get out of sight, sit on a log and have lunch, then see what happens. If you're patient and quiet, things do happen. You can have the same sort of experience while hiking on any non-name-brand trail. Simply follow the same ideas.

I haven't been able to explain this to anyone, not really — they don't want to listen. No one knows what the hell I'm talking about. They are blinded by the bright flashing lights and the dayglo colors. But many of my small trips have felt like they were the culmination of a dream long gestating, and that tells me that they were right. I haven't had to fly between continents or hire guides. I just go somewhere that might maybe be interesting and see what happens. If I try to stay light then I almost always come out ahead.

 

References:

Nimblewill Nomad web site

Ten Million Steps

Nimblewill Nomad, the perpetual hiker (Wikipedia)

Andrew Skurka web site

Andrew Skurka (Wikipedia)

2007 Adventurer of the Year: The Walking Man (National Geographic Adventure)

FTK

 

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Me? Amounting to nothing. As usual.

Who, Me?

(Originally published Wednesday, September 17, 2008 on another blog. Slightly updated here.)

There seems to be a lack of individual responsibility around these days. Or maybe that's just me. Maybe it's always been this way. Probably. Some things I don't notice so good, but I think I'm right on this one.

I've always been surprised by how lazy and opportunistic people are. Maybe that's just me. Maybe I'm not as bright as I've thought, or maybe I just haven't caught on yet to the true meaning of life. Something like that. I haven't caught on to massive sloth and grabbing what's easy.

I noticed during job interviews, or even worse, while on the job, that I scared people when I told them I stood 100% behind my work. Don't know why. That seems like a good characteristic to me, but it's never flown. People get spooked. Someone once asked me if I carry a gun.

Maybe a lot of them are scared to see someone care. Most of my working life was in state government, where, when you swing through the trees, you see a lot of sleepy apes. The entire point of a bureaucrat's life is not to do anything. If you do anything you can be blamed, but you can never be blamed for doing nothing. Everyone in that kind of environment understands the idea of making decisions judiciously. Without question. I.e., doing nothing.

That's why it can take a year to get a stapler unless you steal one from a desk that's just been vacated.

That world works that way because there is never a positive incentive. There is no profit sharing. No bonuses. You don't get big stock options if you bet your job and a lot of company resources on a bold gamble. There is none of that, only the opposite.

Negative incentives.

What is, is. The status quo is the highest good. Muck up and the only option is punishment. Do well and you mess up the status quo. The only option is punishment. Keeping up appearances is the highest good.

I've worked with people who were demoted and moved across town into jobs they knew nothing about only because they happened to work for someone else who lost a turf war. I've seen a talented and experienced programmer given a desk and chair and nothing else, expected to sit there until he gave up and quit, only because he once spoke the truth. I know someone who, as a project manager whose project failed, was given a promotion because she followed the rules as she drove the project into the ground.

No change, no gain. No gain, no pain. A small promotion is about the best you can get, and failure restores a quiet, enduring balance to a bureaucrat's life. A few dollars more a month from a promotion seems like a positive incentive but it's really more of a threat. You have to work harder to keep up appearances, so maybe it's not a good thing to get. And you still have to show up every day for decades until they finally have to turn you loose. No matter who you are, how good you are, if you play in this system you weather and get worn down to the same level as everyone else. You want only to get through today, and live long enough to retire. Nothing more. Trying to actually do something only causes confusion and pain.

I've been a member of two Meetup groups based around web technology. I just learned today that the second one has now also failed. There are 71 members and only nine or 10 have shown up at meetings. The two organizers have been doing the presentations and the rest have been sitting there. People keep joining. And not showing up.

So easy. So clean.

I sort of know a web developer who lost his job when the big bust came a few years back. Henry Shires. In 1999 he hiked the Pacific Crest Trail, using a shelter he made himself. He did it because he wanted to. He didn't sit around waiting for someone to ask, or to give orders. He needed to do the hike for personal reasons, so he did. To help he designed a shelter that was sort of like a tent and sort of like a tarp.

Later he got into web development. I don't know much about this part of his story, but having talked to him a time or two I heard that he lost his job. It was bad all over then. Happened to lots.

Sometime later, after he'd posted his original tarptent plans, then updated them with a new model or two (all free information for the taking), I found that he was in business. Making and selling tarptents.

Now he's one of the big names in the ultralight cottage industry class. Sounds like damning with faint praise but it's really praising with no damns at all. This is tough work, in a small market, and now he has a worldwide clientele and a reputation to go with it.

This is what personal responsibility is about.

First he had a dream, to hike the Pacific Crest Trail. And he did it.

Then he had a job, and then didn't.

Then he created a business and made it work.

This is real web develpment. Henry Shires had a stake in it. He had something to gain. Web development now isn't something for his resume. It is a vehicle for his business. He had a reason to work with that, which was to develop his business, because he liked hiking and liked tarptents. So he took on the responsibility of it all. It gave him a payback. Not like what you get when you decide to become a member of an anonymous group.

Not a big story at all, but nice. Not like clicking a link on a web page and joining a group and never showing up. First Henry showed up at life and then the group joined him.

Now if only I could be so smart.

 

References:

The Olympia Web Design Meetup Group
Tarptent.com
The original Tarptent plans

 

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Me? Still planning to eat my weight in caremel nibbles.

Occasional Definitions: Backpacker

1. A person who hikes, stays overnight along a trail, and carries all needed equipment and supplies.
2. Irresponsible, antisocial, smelly and pigheaded individual who follows his own rules while grinning madly and/or talking loudly to himself. (Yes, they tend to be male.) Quote: "He came to town with one shirt and $20 and didn't change either one."

From: Fire In Your Hand

(Original image from killrob.co.uk. Gone now.)