Calendering is a process that compacts the fibers in a fabric to make it more wind resistant, among other things, "other things" being, for example, more lustrous, having a glazed appearance, and embossing with various patterns, none of which are the least bit interesting to backpackers. All they want is supper and a cozy place to sleep, so shiny surfaces come in at about 476th place.
Calendering is usually done by running fabric between pressure rollers, sometimes with heat. Usually with heat. It's a technical thing.
Kinda makes me sleepy just hearing about it. You too? So let's quit here.
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Me? I suddenly seem to have some pressing business to attend to. Bye.
(1) A "condensation funnel" extending from the base of a towering cumulus or cumulonimbus cloud, associated with a rotating column of air that is not in contact with the ground (and hence different from a tornado).
A "condensation funnel" is a tornado, and not a funnel cloud, if it is either
A) In contact with the ground, and seriously sucking soil, or
B) A "debris cloud" or "dust whirl" (Wheeeee!) is visible beneath it. (Which pretty much means that it is in contact with the ground, eh? Kinda?)
(2) A tornado-like extension hanging down from the base of a towering cumulus or cumulonimbus cloud, and part of a rotating column of air not in contact with the ground. Once it is in contact with the ground or a debris cloud or dust whirl is visible beneath it, it is defined as a tornado. (Totally clear yet?)
(3) The supreme being's suckstraw, juicer of the gods.
Stay away from this one if you can. Don't go up to the railing for a peek.
This is the closest thing we have to an atmospheric black hole, and if it doesn't kill you the flying anvils might. The ones you see swirling around up there. Yes, those are really anvils. Didn't I just tell you not to try getting closer? Man, how dumb are you?
If you had any sense at all you would have turned your bung end toward it and begun moving away smartly, with vehicular assistance if at all possible. Which it usually isn't, if you are in the middle of a backpacking trip, which is why, every now and then, some J. Random Backpacker sort of puckers out of existence entirely, maybe to re-enter reality space near the far edge of a neighboring county, or maybe not. Usually no one cares, but...
The good thing about most funnel clouds is that, like, first, they're clouds, so you can see them, and second, they have this distinctive funnel shape so you can tell them from the other clouds that look like clowns or horsies and such. "Hey, I've heard all about tornadoes," you might say. But no. These are not tornadoes.
The sucking sound is the same, and the flying anvils and all, but funnel clouds are called that because they don't touch the ground. If one touches the ground, then you have a tornado along with all that dust and whatnot that gets in your eyes (in addition to the anvils).
But tornadoes can be surprisingly stealthy. Even invisible. Tornadoes don't need condensation to be tornadoes, which is the thing that makes funnel clouds visible. Which in turn is odd because most tornadoes begin as funnel clouds, in thunderstorms. Oh, life — so surprising at times, innit? Maybe it's time for another beer.
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Me? Still spinning in my grave.
So, Ibuprofen, or Vitamin I (pronounced as "vitamin eye") — what's the deal?
Well, Ibuprofen is an over-the-counter inflammation-fighter and at some point became the first drug of choice for many hikers.
Considered necessary by some as a form of nourishment for the first week or two of a long distance hike, mostly Ibuprofen helps to buffer the level of excitement associated with the pain of sore muscles and creaking knee joints. It's often thought of as one of the essentials by heavy-duty trampers.
Unfortunate side effects include nausea, dyspepsia, diarrhea, constipation, gastrointestinal ulceration and bleeding, headache, dizziness, rash, salt and fluid retention, high blood pressure, esophageal ulceration, heart failure, high blood potassium, kidney impairment, confusion, bronchospasm, and anaphylactic shock.
Can also exacerbate asthma, sometimes fatally.
But hey — how many drugs are perfect, really, even supposedly boring ones?
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Me? Totally committed to staying away from legal drugs.
The time of "ancient life", way before the backpacking era, from about 250 to 542 million years ago in fact. It saw the development of all classes of invertebrates (except for insects, somehow), the appearance of seed-bearing plants, and of amphibians and reptiles (like some of your high school classmates). Basically it had left the stage of pure slime behind, but wasn't yet up to current standards, and extended from the age of trilobites to that of reptiles (all stuff with legs — still creepy but with legs). Evidently it was considered progress, then.
An era slightly before my time, but I found some good fossils from there crawling around in the closet of a place I rented once. And my uncle Ed kinda remembers it. Says he does. Better him than me. Just being around him usually makes me itch.
