Wednesday, January 31, 2024

En Contra

En Contra

I don't live there anymore, but around 20 years back I was out early on a quiet Sunday morning with my camera, standing on the trail next to my tripod in the Capitol State Forest just west of Olympia, WA. I was wondering what my next shot might be when there was a movement off to my right. I turned my head and looked, and saw a really weird brown dog galumphing down the trail toward me.

It was short at the shoulder, its legs only half as long as they should have been, and its head bobbed up and down wildly like that of a hobbyhorse. Nothing about this made sense. It was an animal but put together wrong. I was totally confused.

After a scant few seconds I took a step back to get a bit of perspective change, and the dog-thing-whatever instantly turned itself inside out in less an eye blink and was rapidly retreating the way it had come, still brown, still too low to the ground, still baffling.

But I saw its tail then. I saw that. The tail was long. Really, really long. Brown. As thick as my arm, with that distinctive cat-tail curve.

By the time it reversed course it was maybe within 30 feet of me (9m), just on the other side of a short little jog in the trail. Good thing I moved when I did. It was almost on me.

The whole episode was so strange that I was confused for hours, even though I did inspect the trail and found one perfect kitty-print in the dust, about 4" in diameter (10cm). I finally had to admit that it was a cougar, had to have been, and couldn't have been anything else. Only two hours later, long after I'd left the forest, did fright set in.

This happened in total silence.

I've also seen two lynx, one from my car in Olympic National Forest, trotting nonchalantly down the side of a paved road toward me, and the other in Port Angeles, around 4 a.m. within a block of the Olympic National Park headquarters. Crazy-wild long legs, relaxed trot, fuzzy beer can tail, headed south. Lynx don't live on the Olympic Peninsula. Officially.

You never know.

 

And, a response from our reader...

 

Funny shaped animals on The Trail
Regarding your cougar encounter...

Soon after I moved to the PNW (from Michigan) in 2000, I was living in a furnished apartment in Eastgate waiting for my house stuff to be packed up and moved out to my new house. I was in the habit of going out for an evening jog up the hill behind my house, on a really nice trail that just happened to be there.

One evening, on my way back home I'm jogging along the trail and see a flash of brown cross the trail in front of me. My midwestern brain says, "deer!" When I got to the section of trail where the brown fur had crossed, I stopped to look for tell-tale deer prints, of which there were none. Which I found odd. I walked backwards down the trail towards home for 50 feet, watching for any sign of anything but couldn't see a thing. So I turned and the instant I turned my back I heard a single branch snap. I whipped back around, looking intently for the something that I now knew was watching me, but I couldn't see a thing. So I continued walking away, backwards down the trail.

As I exited the trail, I paid new attention to the sign, noting that I was indeed trail running on Cougar Mountain.

Matt (Wed, Jan 31, 12:39 PM)

 

And then Dave sez...

Cats - you never know. Stuff is out there. Also, yet another reason I'll never go hiking on Brokeback Mountain.

What I've found outdoors is that if you stay quiet and don't move around too much, you witness a lot of things, just by being there.

Probably the strangest for me was seeing a water shrew as I was sitting next to a stream drying my feet after crossing it.

Something exploded out of the water and ran across the surface, then plopped back in. Did that twice more while I was there. I eventually found some info on what it must have been. Before that I'd had no idea that there even was such a thing.

This is pretty good...
Tiny Water Shrews Are the "Cheetahs of the Wetlands".
Nature on PBS: "A water shrew is an insectivore no bigger than a thumb..."
Video (<= Until the link rots anyway.)

 

encounter (n.): Circa. 1300, "meeting of adversaries, confrontation".
From Old French encontre "meeting, fight, opportunity".
Ultimately from Latin in "in" (from PIE root en "in") + contra "against".
Etymonline


Have anything worth adding? Then try sosayseff@nullabigmail.com
Me? Dizzy. Call me dizzy.

 

Etc...

so says eff: sporadic spurts of grade eff distraction
definitions: outdoor terms
fiyh: dave's little guide to ultralight backpacking stoves
boyb: dave's little guide to backpacks
snorpy bits: nibbling away at your sanity
last seen receding: missives from a certain mobile homer
noseyjoe: purposefully poking my proboscis into technicals

Wednesday, January 24, 2024

Yogi

Yogi

(1) The art of swindling food from others, normally from gullible campground residents and clueless tourists, amazed that anyone would actually walk somewhere without being forced to at gunpoint. Technically, yogi-ing must be managed without actual begging. The mark has to believe that they are being magnanimous, and acting on their own volition. This whole deal is named after Yogi the Bear of cartoon fame, who specialized in making off with picnic baskets. (Which he called "PIK-a-nik baskets".)

(2) Mooching food, a ride, or anything else of value from locals or from day hikers.

(3) One who yogis. A con artist in hiking boots who looks pathetic enough that otherwise normal people will go out of their way to help. To yogi successfully one needs to induce people to uncritically "help" without thinking it through first. Asking for a handout is considered begging and not professional-quality yogi-ing.

(4) Yogi-ing may also include the "innocent" or "accidental" theft of another hiker's food, snacks, or special treats, especially while on tight rations due to the thief's poor menu planning. Sometimes the "logic" presented is "You just left it there", or "I didn't think you wanted it", or "I thought you were done with it". And so on.

Punishments can range from a mild reprimand to involuntary separation of reproductive organs from the yogi's body.

(5) The purest yogi-ing is an art, the art of "letting" food be offered cheerfully by strangers without actually asking them directly. While asking for something is generally not allowed, and begging is not fair play at all, and actual stealing is out, limping, wistfully staring, quiet whimpering or similar hints are allowed.

(6) A mythical being thought to be responsible for episodes of trail magic. Sometimes seen during the hours of dusk, or at night, hovering in a vague aura of ghostly luminescence on, near, or just above deserted trails. Anyone witnessing this phenomenon is advised to leave at least a token offering to ensure good luck. It can't hurt.

Example: Ed is a master yogi. He hardly has to carry any food at all. But then yogi-ing is an art quickly mastered by the hungry, and Ed is always hungry.

 


Have anything worth adding? Then try sosayseff@nullabigmail.com
Me? I just ate, thank you very much.

 

Etc...

so says eff: sporadic spurts of grade eff distraction
definitions: outdoor terms
fiyh: dave's little guide to ultralight backpacking stoves
boyb: dave's little guide to backpacks
snorpy bits: nibbling away at your sanity
last seen receding: missives from a certain mobile homer
noseyjoe: purposefully poking my proboscis into technicals

Thursday, January 18, 2024

Wood

Wood

A landscape in the process of being eaten by trees and converted to wood.

 

(1) The original solid fuel, right after dung.*

(2) What you'd do if you could. Oh — wait a minute, that's "would." Never mind.**

(3) The substance of which trees are made, i.e., the hard fibrous lignified substance under the bark of trees. Maybe you've seen some. Mostly responsible for the woofy sounds you hear in the woods when you're out there alone, in the dark. But other things make similar noises, so keep your wits about you, and count your fingers when you get back home, if you do.

(4) A complex organic material composed of cellulose fibers (strong under tension) embedded in a matrix of lignin (strong under compression). Wood is produced in the stems of trees and other perennials, without permission, and under no supervision whatsoever.

(5) The substance making up the central trunk and branches of a tree. Used in construction, or as raw material for manufacturing things like toothpicks.

(6) A complex naturally-occurring polymer of sugar generally regarded as a pretty nifty thing. Used to make sawdust and pencils, among many other fine products. Unfortunately wood, like everything else, is at least 99.9999999% blank, empty space seething with random energies and subject to violent quantum fluctuations that can be understood feebly at best, and then only through sophisticated stochastic methods requiring the attainment of advanced educational levels at obscure institutions, plus lots of equipment. It's a strange and frightening universe, so watch out next time you throw a stick onto that fire there, Bud.

 

* What's brown and sounds like a bell?

** What would wood, if only wood could, nevermind should. (English spelling and pronunciation, go figure.)

 


Have anything worth adding? Then try sosayseff@nullabigmail.com
Me? Stumped.

 

Etc...

so says eff: sporadic spurts of grade eff distraction
definitions: outdoor terms
fiyh: dave's little guide to ultralight backpacking stoves
boyb: dave's little guide to backpacks
snorpy bits: nibbling away at your sanity
last seen receding: missives from a certain mobile homer
noseyjoe: purposefully poking my proboscis into technicals

Wednesday, January 10, 2024

Verglas

Verglas

(1) A thin coating ice on rock or other exposed surfaces. Extremely slippery and usually invisible. Fun!

Might be caused by freezing fog or freezing drizzle, or melted ice that slowly re-freezes and solidifies as pure ice without air bubbles. And so on.

(2) A veneer of "black" (i.e., invisible) ice on rock. (In case you didn't get it the first time.)

 


Have anything worth adding? Then try sosayseff@nullabigmail.com
Me? Never touch the stuff.

 

Etc...

so says eff: sporadic spurts of grade eff distraction
definitions: outdoor terms
fiyh: dave's little guide to ultralight backpacking stoves
boyb: dave's little guide to backpacks
snorpy bits: nibbling away at your sanity
last seen receding: missives from a certain mobile homer
noseyjoe: purposefully poking my proboscis into technicals

Wednesday, January 3, 2024

Turnpike

Turnpike

(1) A trail built with a bed raised above wet, boggy areas, done so by placing mineral soil over fabric between parallel side logs or rocks that run along the edges of the trail tread.

The tread must be "crowned" or raised in the center to enhance runoff, and small ditches usually run along the sides to provide even more drainage.

(2) Or, try this...A turnpike is a road or trail constructed from a combination of gravel, soil, and other filler to make the tread higher than the surrounding water table. Turnpikes are useful in low-lying areas with poor drainage. Boardwalks (See the picture?) are often used instead of turnpikes to accomplish the same goal. So there. (Calm down — it's just a path.)

(3) An overused trail, mostly for getting casual amblers to the more trendy and scenic (i.e., "money shot") backcountry. Turnpikes are often flat, wide, at least sort-of paved, and pretty much always crowded, these days with way too many selfie-clicking idiots.

Examples:

(1) The turnpike allowed us to keep our feet dry, and we also managed to stay out of reach of the bog monster, though we threw it all our spare food, just to be extra safe.

(2) A turnpike sounds fancy (and dangerous in a high-speed way), but it's only something to help keep your feet dry while avoiding the bog monsters.

 


Have anything worth adding? Then try sosayseff@nullabigmail.com
Me? Lost my pike when I turned around. Oh, well...

 

Etc...

so says eff: sporadic spurts of grade eff distraction
definitions: outdoor terms
fiyh: dave's little guide to ultralight backpacking stoves
boyb: dave's little guide to backpacks
snorpy bits: nibbling away at your sanity
last seen receding: missives from a certain mobile homer
noseyjoe: purposefully poking my proboscis into technicals